Create Sexual Tension
continued...
4. Detachment - Again, an independent, secure man does not NEED a woman (or other people, for that matter) for his approval. He can stand alone and separate of her opinion, and it doesn't ruffle his feathers if she doesn't like something he did or said.
This means the ability to walk away, turn away, and otherwise disengage from a woman so that she understands he is not there to kiss her ass.
Another way to show this is to allow for long pauses between contacts with a woman. Don't email her right back. Don't call her right back. A few days could easily pass for a guy who is overwhelmed with women, so why shouldn't it be that way for you right now?
Give her a chance to miss you. (Instead of wondering why you're so desperate that you leave five messages every day.)
These are just some of the ways you can heighten the level of sexual tension between you and a woman.
Now, there are some guys out there that are afraid of raising this tension. I suspect this is partly because this kind of tension feels uncomfortable to them. It can often border on making her angry which is something that most guys are afraid to do. After all, you want her to LIKE you, right? How will making her potentially DISlike you help?
Well, it's really about a push-pull effect. The idea is to induce a gentle tug-of-war with her that will get things started. When she thinks you're going to pull, you give her slack, which throws her off balance. And that's when you pull her back in.
It's just like fishing: Give her a little "line," and see if she bites. When she does, you pull in a little. (Too much too quick and you yank the hook right back out.) Then you give her a little slack so she thinks she's free, and the hook digs in a little more. Then you give it a little tug to pull her back in.
Push-pull. Reel her in, let her go.
The tension you are elevating has only one kind of outlet - sexual attraction. Sometimes it will even start out as anger and then morph into passion and lust. (Remember the opposite of love isn't hate, it's apathy.)
You're better off with a woman that is pissed at you than one that has no feelings for you. Your knee-jerk reaction to her anger is to smooth out the problem, afraid that you've somehow lost her. When you don't NEED, you can't LOSE.
Again, passion very often starts out with a woman APPEARING to hate the man at first.
(Review how this happens in the first Indiana Jones movie, as well as the movie "The Breakfast Club," and especially the police station scene in "Ferris Bueller's Day Off."
Yes, they are movies, but they accurately depict how this phenomenon works. And if you'll watch it closely, it may seem counter to what you might think, but at a gut level - it MAKES SENSE and feels right. This sort of thing happens all the time.)
Don't be afraid of that tension, guys. Feed off it and escalate it. This will make the difference between the guy that walks away with the sweet taste of woman on his lips... or the bland and disappointing taste of her "friendship."* Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating and seduction worlds and an author of bestselling e-books such as Secrets of the Alpha Male, Approach Women - NOW! and Alpha Immersion. Xuma offers dating help for both men and women and can be reached at www.datingdynamics.com
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Xuma says attraction is greatly enhanced by sexual tension.
| BUILDING TENSION |
| Embrace your sexuality |
|
We are all sexual creatures. It's important people see you as one. Make solid eye contact and flirt to ensure you don't land in the 'let's just be friends zone' later. If you try to be non-sexual to avoid being seen as a threat, you're not going to be seen as potential dating material either. Have singles see you in a sexy, playful and flirtatious way. - AllStarDatingTips.com |
