Using Your Social Resume
Talk yourself up without bragging
By Don Diego Garcia, All-Star contributor
Updated: 4:19AM, March 1, 2008
A professional resume summarizes the reasons why an employer would choose you to join their organization. A Social Resume summarizes the reasons why a potential partner would choose you to join into an intimate relationship.
While a professional resume is often communicated through a one-page written document, a Social Resume is more often communicated verbally and through the language of your body. Of course, online dating may be considered an exception to this rule, where written communication is used to be introduced to potential partners.
The purpose of leveraging your Social Resume is to crystallize the reasons why an attractive potential partner would select you, and to define and rehearse a method of effectively transmitting that information.
There are at least two ways to express any quality. Directly and indirectly. If I wanted to communicate that I personified the quality of "creative", for example, I could either do it directly by telling a story where the content of the story relates to my creative ability:
"I used to go painting with my Father. And it was amazing how we would both paint the same landscape but select totally different features to include in our paintings. I was so thrilled when one of my works was presented in one of his gallery showings! (Pause reminiscently.) What artistic outlets do you have?"
Alternatively, I could tell a story such that the way the story is told indirectly communicates my creative ability:
"We were reading a classic in English Literature one day, and the author was taking, like, ten pages to explain how this snail crossed the road, so I livened it up the sleepy session by imagining the snail with swinging 60's psychedelic colored paisleys on its shell, and the road was tiled in mmm... delicious dark chocolate, and that make the story sooo much better. (Pause dramatically.) Have you ever been with someone telling a boring story, while your mind was somewhere else much more interesting?"
Indeed, skillfully communicating a quality indirectly would also allow you to communicate the skill of "subtlety." So, when you are creating your story, decide if you want to use a direct method, or an indirect method, or both.
Most of the time, an indirect method will have a greater impact if done correctly because some people don't like to be 'sold' by something or someone, but they do like to make up their minds for themselves based on their own skills of observation.All social qualities can be sorted into three categories: 1. Attractive, 2. Rapportive, and 3. Romantic. I call these the "Three Social Flavors". The more your partner tastes these qualities in you, the more they will want to eat you up.
CONTINUED: The Three Social Flavors1 | 2 | Next >
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Dating expert Don Diego Garcia says singles can leverage their social resume.
| DON DIEGO GARCIA |
| The Sultan of Stylelife |
|
Don Diego Garcia is a Stylelife Academy co-founder and contributor to the New York Times Bestselling self-help book RULES OF THE GAME - MASTER THE GAME IN 30 DAYS. Diego is a Master Personal and Business Coach who specializes in custom practices for you to magnify your most attractive, most rapportive, and most romantic self. Diego can be reached at the StyleLife Academy. - allstardatingtips.com |
